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News of the Day

Transcript:

48 year old Richard Douglas is being charged with aggravated assault after a confrontation in the men’s bathroom in Lower East Side Manhattan.

Mr. Douglas, a stock broker for 22 years became agitated with the gentlemen in the stall next to him for not flushing the toilet after he released a rather fowl bowel movement.

“What ever happened to common courtesy?” Douglas shouted out, while being escorted by police from his office this afternoon. According to police, Douglas became enraged due to the horrendous odor and kicked the side of the stall so hard it sent the victim flying off the toilet leaving his clothing soiled. The man also suffered a fractured left wrist.

Douglas proceeded to kick the gentlemen while he was down, shouting profanities, and tried to stick the victims head into the feces filled toilet but was stopped by some fellow co-workers.

“I’ve never seen anything like this.” said Martin Steinberg, fellow co-worker and friend of Richard Douglas. “He was always a very calm person. Really easy going.”

Douglas pleaded “Not Guilty”, to the charges.

The victim, who has asked to remain anonymous, is in stable condition at Parks Smith general hospital.

Depression advice

Be happy.. Be well.

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Shit pickle!